It’s What The Fuck Wednesday!

Well well, if it isn’t the most unfun day of the week! This ones got a real what the fuck feel to it too!

My house has gone two years! Yes two years covid free! It was something that I was pretty proud of. Well as of today the universe threw that out the window with what the fuck the ten year old tested positive!

Yes in a house of seven kids it was what the fuck nobody has it yet then boom! The poor boy is achy, headache and just overall blah! He is in quarantine in his room and gets waited on hand and got by mama! He’s so lucky that way!

Youngest boy went and got himself suspended from school Monday and the best solution was that upon his return he would attend half days! His new meds really don’t allow him to attend full days. Well what the fuck now he’s home too until the ninth of February! This strain is super contagious so just waiting for him to catch the shit!

Stepson went to arrive this morning, had to tell him not to come in, went out to chat with his mom about the situation and of course I did a what the fuck moment walked out barefoot and no jacket, it’s still fucking winter. It was decided he’s best to stay with her until negative tests come!

What the fuck! I’m having to kick the husband out of the house without return until further notice as he really has to work being the only income right now. So yup just me and kids and covid!

Ahhhh yes good old what the fuck Wednesday! I see you’ve returned with a vengeance this week!

What the fuck Wednesday we were doing so good!

Audio Book Free!

What book you ask? Well it’s So You’re Not Supermom…. It’s Ok! Rants of a foul mouthed mom Volume 1!

It is a great little listen for any parent, expecting parent or want to be parent!

It’s a no holds book about the crap my kids have put me through!

I have promo codes!

If you are located in the USA or UK and want a free audiobook comment or send me a message!

I would really like to see them get used. As of yet none have been redeemed.

If you’re new to audible you can sign up here: Audible

Workbook Giveaway!

Head over to the link below and enter!

https://parentssurvivalguide807199902.wordpress.com/2022/01/23/workbook-giveaway/

Acknowledgement

It can be a lonely road but you don’t have to go it alone

Parent’s Survival Resource & Connection Group

You have to start somewhere.

Starting with something as simple as acknowledging there may be a need for assessment is a huge step. It’s truly the beginning of it all.

This is when you’ve come to realize next steps and help are necessary. With it comes many emotions and thoughts.

Much like grief of losing someone there’s shock and denial, pain and guilt, anger and bargaining, depression and sadness.

There is no escaping it and it is completely normal to go through it all. Every day is going to be different with ups and downs.

You don’t have to go through it alone. One day you’ll hit the other side of it, the upward turn, reconstruction and working through to acceptance and hope.

You can do this!

If you need support please reach out, we will do our best to guide you with our knowledge.

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New Project Launched!

My partner in crime and myself are so proud, excited and ecstatically happy to anounce the launch of our workbook for those who support others with special needs.

Parent’s Survival Guide- Keeping Your Sh*t Together: A Workbook To Help Organize The Chaos Through Diagnosis

Currently it is only available in paperback however keep your eyes peeled for ebook at a later date!

You’re probably wondering what you can find inside so here is the amazing table of contents.

We placed all of our experience, expertise, resources and best advice into a simple way to follow layout.

Join our facebook community help group as well through the link below.

https://www.facebook.com/Survivalforparents/

You can follow our website https://parentssurvivalguide807199902.wordpress.com/

We look forward to connecting, guiding and supporting everyone!

If you have any questions please feel free to reach out to us!

It’s What The Fuck Wednesday!

Well well today’s hump actually doesn’t seem to be any bigger than a road bump! What the fuck is happening!

Kids got up, rhere was no fighting! No yelling! No screaming! And no f bombs dropped from any of them! The did not argue to change clothes, eat, get out the door or anything! This portal of calm is scary shit!

My youngest boy is on the mends for his health issues, thankfully, he has put four pounds on alreay which means we can now go up a little on his new medication! What a fucking hump this has been to deal with! Kind of like when you go to climb a mountain and all seems well then there an avalanche taking you out! Yup good fucking times.

I finally ended and won the up hill battle with kindle on book three! I swear I never had an issue in the almost four fucking years I’ve been publishing until December. Now almost every fucking time I am arguing my pen name with them! Maybe they will get there shit back together soon!

I got my second oldest boys graduation proofs! I am so proud, sad and every fucking feeling in between about this! I cannot believe this is it for him. He is my little bubba! Emotions are on an uphill over this shit!

This week has been the first hitch of shifts where hubby is gone! It’s been rough, funny how we get used to things and then when they are disrupted you kind of lose a portion of yourself! Mental health has a huge fucking battle for me this week! Fingers crossed it gets easier otherwise….well who the fuck knows!

I want every Wednesday continue this way! Even with the whole emotional, mental health shit, it’s been an easier than some day!

It’s Fuck It Friday!

Wellll hello to another week over! Thanking the universe for that shit!

The weather has been absofuckinlutely shit freezing, like living in a deep freezer for over a week! It’s so cold the poor dogs go to take a shit and it freezes to their ass as it’s coming out! Fuck it I am hibernating until next week!

The kids have been home an extra week as schools decided to not start until the tenth and I’m fucking exhausted! I’ve also got warning that they may flip to online learning which in my house means no learning cuz fuck it I’m not a fucking teacher!

My husband is to embark tomorrow on a new job! I am so fucking excited for him but I’m also terrified. He will be working out of town which means just me and the monsters to our own demises for lengths of time. For years he’s been here daily and the only thing I can say is fuck it, going to figure shit out!

Lately I’ve been wondering if it’s all for naught! By that I mean the whole writing, marketing, promoting cuz you know let’s be honest who wants to listen to a mom bitch about kids and the shit they do? Then I go through all the lovely reviews that some have left and fuck it, there’s just no way I can stop! Sorry not sorry to the internet.

2022 is bringing on a whole new fucking world this year! Fuck it! I’m just going to ride the bitch like I’m a pro surfer.

It’s still early in the morning and the fuck it list has a good chance of adding in fuck it I need a nap! Fuck it the laundry can wait! And fuck it I think I’ll write some new shit to throw out into the universe! But first fuck it I’m up and I need coffee which you can find some fanfuckintastic ones on this beauty blog Beauty of Cafe 205

Hellooooo 2022!

Here we are a new year and a new beginning! Where the fuck has another gone?

Although 2021 was not the greatest year. I actually felt semi accomplished by the last month of it. It helped that I wasn’t working two jobs though!

Anyway, since it’s been well over a hot minute. I’m throwing out some updates.

I collaborated on a workbook to support those with disabilities which is out now! Here

I found time to create a coloring oracle book. 45 Affirmations And Actions for kids! Here

I let loose three journals for anyone who likes to write! Here Here Here.

Volume 1 of So You’re Not Supermom It’s Ok Rants of a foul mouthed mom turned into an audiobook! Here

Last! But not least book 3 in the So You’re Not Supermom It’s Ok Rants of a foul mouthed mom is also done but for some reason kindle has decided to be a bunch of asshats and are now telling me my pen name JN Supermom is misleading and must be removed! Like what the fuck? I’ve had it for four years and never an issue until December 2021.

So while I continue to fight them here is a sneak peek of one from Volume 3

Licensed To Drive?

Who in the fucking government thought it was a good idea to license kids at the sweet young age of fourteen?
For real?
At that age, you’re fucking lucky if you have them trained to hit the toilet bowl approximately ninety percent of the fucking time.
Do they really know the responsibility of driving a vehicle on a road with other motorists?
Well?
Do they?
Probably fucking not!
But as a parent, you are going to teach them. Not just because you’re sick of driving their asses around but because they need to learn to become responsible drivers.
I am on number three child of teaching and let me fucking tell you it does not get any easier.
Or less fucking stressful with the amount that you teach.
They all start from scratch; they all have their quirks and they all can terrify the shit out of you in the process.
The oldest boy had a fucking lead foot, the second boy had a light foot to the point he was under the limit and the first daughter I am teaching now suffers from anxiety!
She is good just very scared and that’s ok as she learns it will get easier!
What it doesn’t get easier on are my nerves!!
I tell you those things are running mother fucking low over the years of kids.
You will have….
Brakes slammed! Head hits the dashboard!
Whiplash! Head thrown back from gas pedal use!
Yell! As they don’t slow soon enough!
Rubber Arms! Reaching to grab the wheel and correct before they hit a parked car!
Leg cramps! As you brace for impact on a curb!
White knuckles! Hang tight to the holy shit handle!
And you will do this, all this, and still, continue to teach them.
You might wonder why you will.
You might make excuses for one or two days just to avoid it.
But in the end, you will.
And when they walk back from that test saying they passed and are licensed, you know it was worth it.
Every heart-wrenching, cringing moment of teaching them paid off!
You feel an accomplishment like no other and then you will worry like a mother fucker every dam time they get behind the wheel without you!
There’s really no winning!
But you can rest easy knowing you taught them and taught them well.
Good job!

Words of wisdom
No holy shit handles?
Install them!

Happy New Year. 2022 has shit in the works and hopefully it’s a great experience all around!

Tis The Season

It’s that time of fucking year where the chaos of what to buy everyone stresses me out to no end!

Where the lists are long and the money is tight. Wondering how to afford everything plus the regular shit of every day life!

Ugh fucking Christmas!

Likely one of the most commercial driven holidays of the year.

Don’t get me wrong now. I love the time with my kids and seeing their faces light up when things randomly appear under the tree with stockings filled of crap!

I just think somehow along the way of society it lost what it was really about!

This year there’s no electronics, no over priced items and we are back to the essentials of gifts! We will enjoy a large dinner that will take all fucking day to make and enjoy some movies or some shit.

Christmas doesn’t have to be big, fancy and overloaded with crap you’re just going to throw out in two months. Enjoy the small things!

It’s also the time I share my version of a classic poem!

Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the house
Not a thing made noise
Not even, old creaky floors
When all of sudden…..
Stoned, drunk and full…..
In comes santa from the party before!!
Flopping face first onto the couch
Saying please god, no more!
He looks over at his tree
Fuck he forgot his family!
The morning would suck
Going out to pick shit up
Hungover over as fuck
The alarm clock struck
He heard a high pitch beep
And rolled back over to sleep
But dammit, he cant!
Now where the fuck are his pants
Tripping as he ran out the door
He just had to find an open store
No coffee in hand
Thinking fuck this shit man!
Pushing and shoving in lines galore
All to please those who care no more
When does it end? When can he rest?
Maybe when under the tree has no room left!

Merry Fucking Christmas Everyone xoxox

I’m Still Alive HaHa

It’s been some crazy ass months leading up to where I am now. There’s no denying the rabbit hole I have spiraled through! It’s almost been a blur most days!

I had gone back to work not just to one job but two. I was working ten to twelve hour days at a full-time position in a veterinary office and holding a part-time position on weekends. This on top of seven kids! Fuck it was insane.

My body finally gave out after three months and I ended up sick and in bed for four days! That’s the most fucking sleep I’ve had in nearly twenty years! Two weeks later I was back at both jobs except it didn’t last long!

Youngest baby had a pediatrician follow up which did not go as planned. His health had struck a point where he can no longer be on the meds he was taking and we are having to start over while attempting to plump him up like a turkey.

With this I’ve had to drop my full-time job as I can not mentally, emotionally or physically do two jobs and transition him again. It’s a fucking twenty-four hour task. We’ve been down this fucking road before! And so far it’s going as expected, which is not well haha! Ugh!

So, I am now at home but still working part-time for the time being. Financially it’s going to suck ass but gotta do what I gotta do. However, with this has come some new opportunities to collaborate on a few projects that I’m soooo fucking excited about!

I am turning my So You’re Not Supermom It’s Ok! Rants of a foul mouthed mom books into audio books!! I found the perfect voice and she actually sounds like me, crazy and fucking awesome! Watch for those!

I have a children’s book in illustration called Teacher Says. This is one of my proudest ever pieces! Inspired and dedicated to my boys who have ADHD. It’s a simple way of explaining how they react to things! No there’s no swears it’s a fucking kids book!

Last, but not least! I am working with a wonderful partner on a workbook design surrounding parenting disabilities. More details to come on this one! We are both over the fucking moon about it but I don’t want to share too much yet!!

It’s amazing how the universe aligns and throws you down when it’s time to change focus!

Thanking the universe for all that has happened and that is to come!